A brush with fame

I recently found a classmate on Facebook from the time I went to art school in London back in the early 90s. She was bringing me up to date on some of the people I met there, and she said “and of course Alison Goldfrapp became famous.” My friend was surprised that I hadn’t realized we had gone to school with the lead singer of Goldfrapp. She said she had a story about me and Goldfrapp that she would tell me when she had more time.

I was of course excited, imagining all sorts of fantastic scenarios in which I impressed a young pop star-to-be. A month went by without a word from my friend. Seeing that the band was coming to New York, I emailed her begging to hear the story. I now wish I hadn’t.

My friend wrote back that one day a handful of us were playing ping-pong, smoking pot and sniffing poppers in the rec room at school. At some point Alison Goldfrapp walked in yelling at them that I was turning green. And evidently I was. According to my friend, Alison then “nursed” me until I could stumble back home.

I told my friend that I remembered the poppers and the ping-pong, but not Alison. She responded that she is confident that Alison still remembers me, because for years after the incident, Alison would chastise her and her friends when they did drugs by reminding them of the time I turned green.

Alison, thank you for your help years ago. I would like to you assure you that you don’t need to use me as a cautionary tale anymore – I’m no longer green. Though at the moment I am a bit red in the face.